Courtesy of Cheryl Watterson, www.selfdefensewithanattitude.com
The event I am about to describe is a true story. It happened to me. Hopefully my story will raise the awareness of those who read it and save them from making the same kinds of mistakes that I made – mistakes that could have cost me serious injury or possibly my life, at the hands of a street thug who prefers to prey on other people rather than work to make a living on his own.
One evening a couple of years ago, I agreed to meet for dinner at a nice downtown restaurant with a couple of friends from work. We live in a city of a little over 100,000 people in the upper Midwest. Our city has what I would describe as a moderate-to-high crime rate with certain areas of the city much more dangerous than others. Some of the more dangerous areas surround the downtown area and some of the more unsavory characters make their living working the downtown streets.
On that evening, as is often the case for me, I got out of the house a few minutes late and that put me into a bit of rush to meet my two my two friends at the agreed upon time. When I arrived at the restaurant, the area was congested with traffic due to a concert at a nearby theatre and there were no parking spaces available. After circling the block a couple of times, I decided to go one block further west to find an open spot. With this, I was successful in finding a spot. But as I parked and exited my vehicle I knew instinctively that this was not a good spot. The street was on the fringe of an unsafe area and I would be making the long walk back to my car well after dark. Being several minutes late already, I put aside the internal warning and proceeded to the restaurant in anticipation of a nice evening with friends.
Following dinner, we decided to walk to a nearby Irish pub in the heart of downtown for a nightcap. The pub was closer to where I had parked my car so it seemed like a good thing. After a couple of drinks, we called it a night and left the pub. My two friends were parked back near the original restaurant so they headed back in that direction. I turned and realized that I would be walking across a completely dark open area between the buildings to return to my car. At that instant, a man approached me and asked if I could spare him a couple of dollars. Figuring him to be the typical panhandler, I brushed him off and started walking toward my car – and into the dark. After only a few paces, I heard footsteps behind me and realized that I was not alone. Turning, I saw that it was the same man that I had just brushed off.
By then he had caught up with me and requested money again. Looking back, I realize how foolish it was but I continued to try and walk away from the man and toward my car which was then about 100 feet away. It was pitch dark between the buildings with not a sole around except me and the unwanted stranger. He persisted and I continued to refuse and kept walking. Finally, he proclaimed that I had left him no choice – he was going to have to cut me. With that, he pulled out a knife and began to wave it at me. At that instant I can hardly describe what was going through my mind other than to say that I was very scared and I could definitely feel my adrenalin starting to pump. I turned to face him, backing away to get a little distance between us. I don’t know why I didn’t run and I don’t know why it never occurred to me to give him my wallet. I think there was just something in me that said I’m not going to let this guy rob me.
I put up my hands in a defensive position. Thoughts raced through my mind as to what I would do if he lunged at me. Then words blurted out of my mouth that I didn’t expect. I told him I was going to break his [expletive] neck if he didn’t back off. This would have been an excellent time to have been armed with mace, pepper spray, or a Taser but I had nothing except my wits. He kept coming at me waving the knife. Lucky for me, at that moment where my back was against the proverbial wall, a car turned into the alley we were in and lit it up with its headlights. I glanced at the car and then back at my assailant. When I looked back at him, the car had apparently frightened him and he began to slink away into the darkness.
By then I was only 30 feet or so from my car and ran to it. When I reached into my pocket for my keys, my key ring caught a seam or something inside my pocket and for an instant I had to wrestle with my keys to get them free. That was an added bit of drama I could have done without. By the time I was into my car and driving away, my heart began to pound in my chest and I had to inhale and exhale deeply several times to make that feeling go away. I knew I had just escaped a very bad situation. I reported the incident to the police but my guess is this guy was back out on the streets the very next night trying to take advantage of people who make the same kinds of mistakes I made. If that car (or what I consider to be my guardian angle) hadn’t come along when it did, I might not be writing this article now.
Lessons learned from this event:
1) Always pay attention to your instincts – if something tells you this is a dangerous situation, it probably is and you should take immediate action to improve the odds.
2) Give yourself time to spare – When going out in the evening, give yourself enough time to reach your destination with time to spare. This will help to prevent making bad decisions such as the one I made by parking in an unsafe spot because I was more concerned about being late than I was about my own personal safety.
3) There is safety in numbers – If you are parked in different areas, walk together with others to the nearest car and then let the driver drop you off at your car.
4) Make noise and move toward crowds – If confronted by a stranger on the street, don’t be afraid to yell out and move quickly toward other people or into a place of business. Never do the foolish thing that I did and walk away from the crowd and well lit street into a dark area when a suspicious person is near by.
5) Grip your keys in hand when walking alone – Have your keys out and tightly clenched in your fist when walking to your car. I had a set of keys in my pocket with a panic button on the key fob. It didn’t occur to me to use it. In fact, I never even reached for my keys until I got to my car. If actually attacked, your keys, tightly clinched in your fist, can be a weapon and is certainly better than nothing.
6) Own self-defense products – Lastly, with the availability of many affordable self-defense products on the market today, it is wise to become informed about these products and look into purchasing them for yourself and your family. If I had been carrying mace or pepper spray that June evening, I might have been able to extricate myself from a very dangerous situation before it reached the point that it did.
Self-defense, personal security, and safety is not just for women. As you can see, men need to be concerned about their personal security and safety also. I’m glad Ken’s story turned out like it did – because Ken is my husband and my best friend.
Remember women and men, Stay Aware…Stay Alert…Stay Alive!
